Mes Amis

Relationships are complex around the world. I find relationships between people to be the most interesting thing. 

The dynamics and set-up of said relationships differ immensely from country to country. 

Americans are friends with everyone. Their spouse, their best friend, their neighbor, the random people they cross on the sidewalk, the guy who picked up their pencil, the girl two rows back in class, the dude across the street with the same shirt on, their neighbor'a dog, the list is endless. Yet, if the man who made conversation with them in the subway the day before called them up asking for a favor- they would be a little put off. 

We may have a hundred friends and one best friend. 

The French only value these "best friend" relationships. 

They will have a small group of really close friends that they will keep for life.

They seriously do not take these things lightly here. If you are accepted into one of these intimate circles you are there for life no questions asked. 

This makes life different over here. 

When walking down the street here, you avoid eye contact to the person you pass. 

I, of course I'm American, took offense to this at first. I didn't understand why these people were so above me that they couldn't be bothered to acknowledge me. 

I didn't understand the culture. 

They were being polite.

In their minds, it would be rude to make eye contact and give nothing more than a shallow nod of the head or "good day" (again, there is no value in shallow relationships). 

When we say "hello" or "good morning" we mean nothing by it other than "I see you". When I receive a "bonjour" here, it is an invitation of friendship. Which can be accepted or denied, either is acceptable. If I accept, I reciprocate the "bonjour". If I do not, I simply ignore (this is more acceptable in a situation when it is a guy talking to me). If it is a professional relationship (me buying bred and conversing with the boulangère). It must be wrapped up with a "merci!" pause "au revoir!"  

There is no situation too inconvenient to greet a friend. 

Walking around the jungle of a cafeteria, I could make eye contact with a guy from the bible study I go to once a week (all French, no English, so it's not like I've had real deep, good talks with these people) and he will make his way to me and we will do the "bisous" (cheek kiss thing) with trays in hand and people knocking into us. "Bonjour, ça va?" "Oui, ça va!" "A bientôt!" "A bientôt!"

Every. Time. 

When walking into a room (such as a church, dinner, a classroom) you must shake hands and/or bisous every male and bisous every woman. One by one. Only then is it acceptable to relax and begin to converse or go about your business. 

They really have a way of making you feel wanted.

Life is good. 

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